It's amazing when a life altering event can give you clarity.  On July 7th, 2013, my mother passed away after a long battle with kidney and heart issues.  I'm an only child to a single mother, and so, as you can imagine, it rocked me to my core.  But it didn't rock me in the way I'd anticipated.  Along with the grief came so much clarity.  Who was I now?  For so long, I'd only been her daughter, as that's all she'd wanted me to be. (Another blog for another time).  So, now that she's gone, who would I be?  Well, the sky was the limit.  And, I realized, what i wanted more than anything in the world was to find my soul mate.  To finally find that person to walk through life with, and I decided to get serious about it.

I live in a very small town in the middle of nowhere Washington State.  It's tough to meet people here, as most of the population is married or divorced, and almost all of them have children.  So, rather than venture out into the ridiculousness that is the bar scene around here, I decided to join eHarmony.  

After two weeks of not a whole lot going on, a man appeared on my match list.  He was good looking.  Age appropriate, and had no children!  His profile was intriguing and exciting, and for the first time since i started, I instigated communication.  He took his time responding, but easily we got through the eHarmony process.

He works an interesting schedule, and is out of the country for five week stints.  And one of those stints was starting, only days after we first spoke.  So, even though we probably moved to the phone faster than eHarmony would have liked, it just felt right.

And then I heard his voice. :)  That sweet, soft, deep voice, with just a hint of a southern accent hit me the moment I heard it.  And it speaks about spirituality, energy, and passion like none I've ever experienced.  At the least i'm intrigued, and the possibilities of what I could be are too vast for me to even utter out loud at this point, so I'll just smile a goofy grin and keep that to myself.

Four days of live conversation on the phone and so many hours I can't even count them, and I feel like he's getting me on a level no one ever has before, and I'm elated and scared all at the same time.  is this real?  is this true?  Could i ACTUALLY get everything I have been asking for?

I don't know the answers to those yet, but I'm super excited for the journey.

He left last night, on a flight to Singapore.  He'll be unreachable for 5 weeks, except for by email.  I can't wait to see what words he sends my way from across the globe.  Missing him already.